Transgenderism: Is It A Gender Identity Disorder? Or Just Different?

What age do we really start to remember things? I have some vague memories when I was a kid? I am pretty sure I was not yet four years old. Because when I was four years old, we were already living in a different house. I can remember when we have a guest and asked me how old I was. I said I was four. But the memory I want to share now was before that, because I remember we were still in that old house. I must be three years old or even younger. Is it possible that we remember things at that age?

In that old house, I was not older than three years old, there was a huge party. I am not sure what kind and whose party. All I remember is that there are a lot of food and a lot of people. There was a teenage girl who I think used to baby sit me. I asked her to take off her skirt, because I want to wear it. When she refused, I cried out loud on the floor.

One day, I and my grandmother were in the market. She was planning to buy me slippers. Of course, as a boy, the slippers that my grandmother had in mind are slippers suitable for boys. I did not want that. I liked the pink slippers with pretty ribbons on the side. Again, I cried out loud on the market and did not stop until I got the pink slippers with ribbon I wanted. I was not yet six years old. I went to kindergarten when I was six. I was not in kindergarten on this event. Maybe I was five?

As a kid I had a huge doll. That doll was about half my size. I also used to have kitchenware and tea party play sets. I used to play a lot with that doll and my kitchen wares. As I played, I imagined that I was a mommy.

Then, I grew a little bit older. I went to school. I always get along with girls. I never played with any single boy. I find them very intimidating. I always feel safe and at home with my own crows, which is all females. Most adults always mistake me for a girl, because I behave, move, and talk like a girl. They will just know that I am a boy when I tell them my name. The most common reaction that I get: “Oh you are a boy! I thought you were a girl!”

I did not behave the way a boy is expected to behave. As a kid I was aware that I was different. It used to bother me a little, because I thought there was something wrong with me. I never been to a psychologist or a psychiatrist when I was a kid, but if I did, they will diagnose me with Gender Identity Disorder. Now that I am an adult, I look back to this specific period of my childhood, then I realised I have trouble with the word disorder. It implies that I am sick. I might be different, but it does not mean that I have a disorder.

Why I Joined The Blogging Community As A Transgender Blogger?

We all have different reasons and motivations why we blog. We like to express ourselves, express our thoughts and feelings, share our experiences and to connect with other people who have the same interest like us. As for me, aside from expressing my thoughts and feelings, I enjoy reading and exploring different blogs more than wirting one myself. When I read your blogs, specially written by people like me who are transgenders who are writting about transgenderism, I do not feel alone. In my heart and mind I am with them in this virtual community. Like them, I also have the same struggles and sufferings. The blogs of other transgender people here who write about their experiences as transgenders are really inspiring. I am very happy to be able to get connected with you.

I am really looking forward to find more blogs of, for and about transgenders here in wordpress.com. I would like to be connected with you and also to communicate with you through our blogs. My vision is to have this transgender blogging community where we would connect our blogs, write, read and comment on our post and really become virtual friends. I am thinking more of a transgender bloggers club. A small community in this virtual world. That would really be nice!

I have just started blogging again. I really enjoy blogging. I always have the urge to share my thoughts and feelings. So far, I have already found a lot of transgender bloggers who blog about transgenders. I really hope that we could connect with each other and be able to comment on transgender and feminist issues through our shared struggles and experiences. I have already found some blogs writing about transgenders and I really enjoy reading all of them. As much as possible, I am also trying to comment on their blog entries.

I hope that this blog will grow with your blogs. Thank you!